Birth Stories > Marieke's Birth Story

Mark and I were very excited to find out we were expecting a baby, only shortly after we decided to start a family together. We were overseas in Holland at the time, visiting my home country. At the second ultrasound we learnt that we were having a boy and we named him Oliver. I was four months pregnant when we returned to Australia, and I was keen to find out what my options were for the birth. I couldn’t believe my luck when I found out that St George hospital in Kogarah had just started a home birth program, for which midwives come to your home to assist you with the birth. Giving birth at home is a very common thing in Holland but I found that many people were quite apprehensive about it in Australia, especially since it was my first baby. Nevertheless, I felt very confident about having my baby at home. Shortly after, I met the two midwives who were going to come to our home and I loved their philosophies on birth- it’s a great, natural event that should empower you as a woman and most of all- it’s something to celebrate and experience, not to be afraid of.

I was lucky to have a smooth pregnancy with no morning sickness or other hiccups, so I worked until week 35. The last month of my pregnancy I spent at home preparing myself and our home for Oliver’s arrival. I really enjoyed taking time out and just reading my book or having a snooze outside- just being pregnant. I felt very relaxed and ready for the big day! 

In week 37 I was checked and approved to have my baby at home, should he decide to come at any time after that. The midwives came to our home to see where the big event would take place and to meet everyone who was going to be there on the day. They also brought a trolley full of ‘birth supplies’ that they left at our home, so they wouldn’t have to pick it up at the last minute. I had read a lot about different types of birthing options and was really interested in water birth. I love swimming and always feel great being in the water, so it seemed perfect. The more I read about it, the more enthusiastic I became. When I watched a number of videos on gentle waterbirths, I was convinced that this was the way to go for me. Our own bathtub was too small to give birth in so I had to find something else instead. I did some research and eventually opted for an inflatable pool especially designed for waterbirths (www.simplybirth.com.au). It was a beautiful dark blue, round pool with very sturdy thick walls and an inflatable bottom. We did a test run at 37 weeks and I loved it, in fact I couldn’t wait to use it!

It turned out I didn’t have to wait too long. Oliver was due on December 3rd but having heard about other women’s first pregnancies, I wasn’t expecting him until at least the week after that. However, on November 25th I had some small contractions after I woke up – nothing to worry about, I told myself, probably just something I ate. We visited Marks dad and even set out to go shopping, but when we were on our way to the shopping centre I asked Mark to turn around and go home. The contractions were getting a bit more intense and I found it harder to ignore them or even to keep breathing through them normally. At home, I went to lie on the bed but found I could cope much better with the contractions kneeling on the floor with my arms on the bed. I made a hot water bottle which did wonders for a while, and had some porridge (just in case…). We started timing them, as they now came at about 3-5 minutes apart and lasted a minute- and realised that our baby was on his way- these were real contractions! We called the midwife around midday and told her about the timing of the contractions. Her response was clear: the baby is coming, I’m on my way! Mark started filling up the pool and called my sister in law, who we’d asked to be there for the birth. 

When the midwife arrived at 1pm I was 4 cm dilated, so I had to wait a little longer before I could go in the pool. If you enter the water too early, you can slow your labour right down. So I kept labouring on 'dry land' for a while until I was dilated enough to get into the pool, which was set up in our lounge room. As soon as I got into the warm water, the pain eased away and I felt much more comfortable. This was what I had been hoping for but it was even better than I imagined! I was also very happy that I didn’t have to go into the car to drive to hospital, but instead was able to stay in our own home where I felt at ease. After about half an hour of relaxed floating and moving around in the pool, pushing contractions started. I was able to move quite freely in the pool and this helped me dealing with the contractions. I sat on my knees, with my arms over the edge of the pool for each contraction, and my husband Mark held my hands. In between contractions I stretched my legs backwards and just floated. My sister in law gave me ice cold apple juice and patted my head with a cool wash cloth, which was really nice. As I was literally in my own space, I felt much more in control and that really gave me the strength to ‘do the job’. I only got up once so that the midwife could check the dilation (and even then she could have done it while I was in the water), but after that I didn’t have to get up anymore. She regularly checked Oliver’s heartbeat with a waterproof monitor and talked to me to see how I was going. 

After what felt like hours of pushing contractions (in fact, it was only about an hour) I assumed that the baby should be nearly there, but the midwife told me he was still a while away. For a moment I became a bit stressed, thinking that it was going to take much longer than I thought, and wondering whether I could really do this myself. But then I tried to remember all the breathing exercises I learnt at prenatal yoga and the pregnancy classes with Julie, and I became more relaxed. I also started talking to Oliver, which must have sounded a bit funny but it felt really natural- I told him we were in this together and we’d get the job done! It felt like we were both working hard to get him out safely. At the same time, the midwife was really talking me through it, reassuring me that I was doing well and that everything was going according to ‘plan’- which was exactly what I needed to hear. And Mark just kept holding my hands and stroking my hair- he was (seemed!) very relaxed, which helped me, too. 

At around 4.15pm I finally felt Oliver’s head coming down and at the same time, I felt my waters break. I knew for sure then that this was it- the movements I felt before didn’t even come close to really feeling his head going through the last part. Very shortly after I had an enormous urge to push and in one big move, Oliver shot out- head and body at once! I was still facing the other way so the midwife guided him underneath my legs to the middle of the pool. Then I turned around and held him in my arms. Mark had wanted to catch him but unfortunately, I was squeezing his hands too tight when he was coming out! After a few big screams Oliver relaxed and lay in my arms for a few minutes in the nice warm water. Mark held both of us and we just sat there, the three of us, looking at each other. It was the most magical moment in my life! Mark cut the umbilical cord and after a while, the midwife took Oliver to wrap him, so he wouldn’t cool down too much. A few minutes later I delivered the placenta quite easily in the pool. 

After I got out and had a quick shower, I gave Oliver his first breast feed. What a fabulous experience!! Mark sat next to me and helped me position Oliver for the feed, and then he started sucking a little bit. I was so proud of Oliver, having made this big trip from a nice warm environment inside me to the big cold world. We just couldn’t stop looking at him. Then we called everyone in Holland to let them know Oliver was here. The midwives stayed for a few hours, making sure we were all doing well. Marks dad came, and his brother, and then everyone left and it was just the three of us. We were so happy to be at home with our little man, and fell asleep together in our big bed. 

The next few days we had some visitors, but as most of our relatives are from Europe we were mostly together- which was just what we needed. We just spent hours looking at Oliver, cuddling him and of course taking heaps of pictures and video for the family overseas. Mark cleaned, washed, did the shopping and cooked, and I just enjoyed being a mum for the first time! I was feeling really well and didn’t really want to be in bed all day- I just moved around the house and tried not to sit down for too long in one spot (ouch!). It was hard getting up at night for the breastfeeds but once I was up I really enjoyed spending time with Oliver while everyone was asleep- just the two of us, on the couch. Unfortunately I had some difficulties breastfeeding after a few days, with Oliver not latching on properly. It was very nerve wrecking for all of us; I was very full and wanted him to suck, he was very hungry but couldn’t get any milk out, and Mark felt helpless watching us struggle! Luckily, with the help of a lactation consultant from St George hospital (who came to our house), things improved pretty quickly and with Oliver’s first birthday coming up I am still happily breastfeeding at least twice a day. Oliver is doing really well and has started taking his first steps- a milestone for all of us. We love him so much and still can’t believe our luck sometimes that he really is ours (well, for the next 18 years or so)! 

Looking back on the whole experience I feel gratitude that everything went exactly as I hoped it would. Being at home made me feel relaxed, birthing in the water eased the pain and made me more comfortable. Also, having three wonderful people helping me throughout the birth, each in their own way, was wonderful. I would try and do everything exactly the same again next time, and would keep my fingers crossed that it would be the same fabulous experience as it was this time.